You know, I have really been ok for a while now with the whole infertility thing. I haven't sat and ruminated over it, I haven't shed a single tear, probably for at least a year.

And then.

Then we were at my parents on Sunday having a nice big family dinner, (in which my husband made the turkey, all by himself, while I worked) and of course, my brother and SIL were there. I'm sure you've heard of them, the ones that pop out babies every year or two? My beautiful neice, Madison, who is now 18 months, was running around, giggling, like 18 month olds do. (Especially when their FAVORITE uncle Dan is chasing them, like he does, for HOURS.) And Dan looks up at me and says, "Can't we adopt?"

Just out of the fucking blue.

I'm all like Ha Ha on the outside, but it tears me the fuck up on the inside that I can't do that one thing for HIM, not to mention, for myself. I can't give him another child.

So, it just kinda sucked, is all.